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Thursday, April 22, 2010

Being single is being happy!!!stop excuses you jerk…

Third law of Love :: For every idiot there is an equal and opposite gender idiot ...... Singles are people with incomparable intelligence



I am single offcourse not by choice but by chance, still misses her like anything at times, still when i saw her messages or hear her name, I always skips a beat in my heart, however I feel better than ever , because she gave me a reason to believe that I am not that Mr. Perfect and still have good potential to groom myself mentally if not physically.

Now I am independent , no need to get indulge into any kind of non sense conversation of Pink color butterfly on red neck sausage bottle of Punjabi grill and eventually ending on a remorseful conclusion on a tiny ear ring.

Well whatever!!! today I started writing again after a decent interval, so many things happened in between, never got enough time to pen down my latest fantasies into essay types post facilitated (or powered) by my third class examples, making you all believe that somebody has gone crazy and still trying to prove that he is among the best possible human species mankind can ever have or had ….

So today I saw my each and every post once again and at times I thought I am really good but as soon as I start believing it , I crawl over to next paragraph where all my dreams of becoming a good writer seems to be in vain, coz some paragraphs are really pathetic , if any one of you managed to read my posts , you surely deserve a pat on your back after surviving reading such crap.

Well meanwhile I am writing this post , I am getting into my old senti zone, possibly she is doing it again, she’s again the culprit for all kind of tortures you all gonna have for next few line(ooops!!! paragraphs).

Is there any way of getting out of it, I swear god , I hate this thing and I wanted to get rid of this, but somehow i think I am addicted to this pain, and I am kind of liking it, I am going back and forth to it again and again, and only to get more depressed , and still managing to survive another day , it seems this whole world has gone crazy to entertain you , be it actors , directors, painters, cricketers, jokers , singers , musicians etc… all of them are working tediously to make you happy , and if you still manage to stay upset then you are being too harsh on yourself and not anybody else.

See we are sometimes very eager to give explanations for things , for which we don’t really have an explanation , so what if I stumbled in life, so what if I made a wrong choice , but I know deep inside it’s not difficult to regain , I know what i am … a single mistake cannot change me. I know everything is nice around me , life has everything to enjoy , but I don’t know why I feel alone, why I feel so incomplete , I know the answers but wish I didn’t.

I am not seeking any advice , I know advice is what we ask when we already know the answer, I know deep down inside why I am writing this , why I read all my blogs once again, I absolutely agree with some of the points penned down by my enlightened mind and yes some of them made me think otherwise. I am a confused person, a big time complex in my thoughts which actually justifies my blog title.

This comment can create controversy and yes affect my self-respect but i am still not able to figure out the conclusion, i've written all this thing nicely ,in fact in my blogs , i tried to put some simple , direct ‘dil se’types things but…..

See, being in love is very beautiful and the best thing for sure, watching your fantasies converting into realities is second best!

Yes most of the times its starts with superficial traits of the other gender, probably understanding factor overrides later on. But at this phase when one tries to make it work, because one can feel loyalty, compromises and commitment as utterly important riders for love.

I am deviating from the topic in renowned way, but if this thought is in my mind then I should express it, we both had awesome moments, still feel attracted to her, tried to save my relationship, not able to manage my last communication. then you seek help, whatever help you get works as a lead for you, it feels like that you are on a hunt, each time when you feel that you are there, it’s just changes the path, then you have to start all over again , there is no other feeling other then disappointment, hopelessness and helplessness , you know more the time you take more the distance you make ,you have to do something , anything just to make your presence felt, you do all the crazy things, that’s when your blind, deaf and dumb kind of love comes into existence , the world is totally against of you, you know it deep inside that nothing left, then this love pushes you , shows you invisible leads , those were never existed earlier and then this mirage will kill your identity , your mental state, your self-respect, your ego ,just for the sake of a bloody emotion…. Love!!!

Dude that’s when you feel restless, all you want is break up , you just want to get out of it, you want to close all the open chapters , all you want this to be done mutually , let’s sit and talk, what’s wrong in that, every second couple in this world had breakup, why you want your breakup to be unusual ? Sooner or later every wound will heal up , scar would remain there forever. Just you trusted your partner more than anything else, you were expecting some understanding and that’s where so called “mental level” precedes understanding.

This vanishes all the beautiful memories and create ultimate frustration and irritation, first you try to accept the things, initially you find yourself successful in doing that, you try to move on, then suddenly some cute event repeats themselves, then you start missing her again, you need your answers, you need the reasons for all the good times and bad one off course.

Ok, I think I should finish writing again, coz I am not getting to any conclusion , I’ll write something better next time that’s my ‘vaada’, this topic is not doing the trick for me.


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